LIFE IS PUNNY

I went just for dessert....

2011-09-28T20:41:00.000-07:00

severed brownies anyone?

Mother of the Year Award Anyone?

2011-09-27T11:38:00.000-07:00

This is from the bulletin board just outside G3's classroom.
All the adorable 2nd graders wrote about their favorite books.
And guess who wrote this one?

I'm a bit surprised it made the board!

What the?...

2011-09-26T19:28:00.000-07:00

....UNfreaking believable!
what will they think of next?

Get yours today at
Bed Bath and WAY Beyond
or should I say...
Bed Bath and Behind!

Nothing beats....

2011-09-25T22:04:00.000-07:00

....telling it like it is!

Simplicated...

2010-03-15T17:32:00.000-07:00

These are the instructions that came
with a game my brother got for Christmas.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

Pick me, pick me!

2010-01-08T22:34:00.000-08:00

On a bulletin board at the Elementary school...

Each student wrote down reasons why

Santa should pick them as a helper.
Lots of them had spelling errors,

but this one... really stood out and I

just had to take a picture of it!

Appetite Suppressant

2009-11-23T15:41:00.000-08:00

Found this gem while I was helping
clean at my Father-in-laws.
He didn't want to keep this card...
not that I wonder why!

===========

It's all in the angle...

2009-10-24T13:24:00.000-07:00

Couldn't pass up taking this pic...

Big Bro. adds his own tasty twist...

Good Advice...

2009-09-27T20:09:00.001-07:00

... where you'd least expect it!

-----

This is the packaging from a book cover

G2 needed for school. I had to laugh when I saw the

Don't Drink & Drive Warning on the back.

Maybe it should say Don't Read & Drive.

-----

Did you hear that?

2009-09-17T20:42:00.000-07:00

MAXImum craftiness...

2009-08-13T22:31:00.000-07:00

4 MAXI pads

1 Hot glue gun

Decorative foam stickers

One hilarious

White Elephant Gift

YOU KNOW YOU WANT THESE!

i know...
me & my mad crafting skills,
don't be jealous!

*****

What the?

2009-07-09T12:16:00.001-07:00

G1 just got back from a 2 week trip with

my parents to visit his cousins back East.

Before picking him up at the airport,

we knew he had a 'special surprise' for us.

(from my brother and his wife)

We'd sent him with a fresh shave...
(using the # 1 attachment so he still had some hairs)
Well, they bic'd him down to nothin.!

-----

But wait, there's more...

-----

A little bonus in the back!

G2 noticed it first and his response was... what the?
My dad was telling everyone who noticed that he has

so many grandkids he has to number them!

Hmmm, I'd say it looks more like...

2009-05-14T07:22:00.000-07:00

Usually I only post things that I take pictures of myself,
but I saw a link for this on Yahoo and I couldn't resist.
Supposedly, it's a 35,000 year old ivory sculpture of a woman.
How do they know it's not really just
a pile of petrified cave man turd?

-----

Pads for Mothers Day...

2009-05-10T21:56:00.001-07:00

Got these from the Taller Half...
We've always wanted to try them.
Stay tuned to find out who is more

-TOXIC-

I got a wild hair and decided to make

cinnamon rolls this morning. You can't

tell in this pic, but they turned out HUGE,
even bigger than a cinnabon!

-----

G3 & I had an interesting conversation
while I was rolling the dough;

G3: "Mom that looks like a part of your body"

Me: "Do you mean my stomach?"

G3: "Yeah it looks like your tummy, but
it doesn't have a belly button."

This card was from all 3 boys...
I love that it has a pacifier.
G3 was a nuk man and always had to
have one, but it had to be upside down.
If we put it in right side up, he'd
always flip it over, even in his sleep!

Another of G3's domino people.
Mystery solved... I asked him what
was up with the dots and he said it
was my "privacy" and my belly button!
I've put in a request for clothing on his
next drawing of me!

A very creative card and a
bouquet of hands from G3!

This super crafty one is from G2...
What does he mean by...
"She feeds me sometimes?"

An awesome card from G1
He made it for me at school!

No need to fear...

2009-05-06T13:29:00.000-07:00

...no swine flu here!

So Purty...

2009-05-05T13:40:00.000-07:00

...I couldn't resist!

Package of curlers $1

Putting them in G1's hair in the night...

Priceless!

How to NOT get a reply...

2009-05-04T11:46:00.000-07:00

My sister is on a singles site
and scored this gem...

Oiy, Red Flag!...
When i saw your profile i was really attracted to it because
u were looking so Beautiful and i could not stop looking
at ur profile pictures so I decided to mail you.

Creepy Vibe Inducing...
I wish I could see through your eyes so I would know what
you like to see. I wish I knew your wishes, so I could give
you everything you want. I wish I dreamed the same dreams
you do, and together we could make them come true. I wish
I knew what makes you happy, so I could make you the
happiest person in the whole world.

Totally and Completely Phobifying...
And lastly, I wish I were a cell in your blood,
so I would be sure I was somewhere in your heart.

Do Not What?

2009-05-03T23:18:00.000-07:00

Darn! It looks so tasty,

I really wanted to give it a try!

Reality check...
From the tip of it's head to the tip of it's tail,

this dinosaur is easily at least 3" in length.
Swallowing it would be quite the feat!

QUOTE...

2009-04-30T01:07:00.000-07:00

...OF THE DAY

'Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater.
If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby.
If you give her a house, she'll give you a home.
If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal.
If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart.
She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.
So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of @#$!.'

...YUM, it's in the shape of a Hershey's Kiss.

Got this via e-mail and just had to bloggit,
because just as it said in the subject line... It's true!

Tahoe vs. Telephone Pole...

2009-04-29T06:29:00.000-07:00

...Revisited!

The original blurb about the crash was posted on March 9th.

This awesome illustration was done by
the neighbor kid that happened to go
along for the [wild] ride.

In his 4th grade class they each had to write a

story about something and this was his topic of choice...

Another funny side note to the incident is that at the exact time
I was on my cell phone with my brother-in-law telling me he'd
crashed my car, my neighbor was on her cell phone telling
the neighbor kids mom that he'd gone along for the ride and that
yes, he was with a responsible and safe driver!

Here's another pic of the damage...

wHo NeEdS tOyS...

2009-04-28T05:23:00.000-07:00

When you've got

masking tape...

Ha Ha U So Funny...

2009-04-24T12:27:00.000-07:00

This is a book my parents
(aka: Grandma & Grandpa Far Away as G3 calls them)
gave to G2 for his Birthday...

he loves it!

Not that G2 needs any help being funny,
he's our little comedian.
Here's more of his hilarious homework...

In case you can't read it, I will translate:
Because I'm so smart!!!!

And... I figured it out with Ellsworth Excelling Eagles Brain.
And... I already knew it in first grade.

G2's Birthday Party...

2009-04-23T16:21:00.000-07:00

The Invitation.. Target Practice... The Tower of Tasty Donuts...

Ginorma

donut...

Our
SURPRISE

visitor
apprehends

the
birthday

boy!

15 boys and a plethora of Sugar Infested treats...

Good Times were had by all!

Me & the Peapod...

2009-04-17T01:29:00.000-07:00

This vintage artwork came from a folder

of stuff my parents had filed away from my

Elementary School days. So I would have been

somewhere in the single digits when I made it.

Just for the record...

I don't remember ever being put to bed without food,

I wonder what the teacher thought about that.

*****

Tune in Tokyo...

2009-04-13T10:06:00.000-07:00

Here's one of the boys being wild and crazy as usual.

I got a good laugh when I took a closer look!

Doodle of the Fam by G3

2009-04-10T17:48:00.000-07:00

I love this work of art!
We're like domino people!
Hmm... I wonder what the extra dots on me and
The Taller Half are supposed to be?

A Pocket Full of...

2009-04-08T22:36:00.000-07:00

... all kinds of crazy stuff! I never know what I will find in the boys pockets when I am doing laundry. There is usually always plenty of sand, but I've come across many other random and strange things over the years. For a time I would find empty sugar packets in G1's pockets. That was during his sugar eating phase, which I think is over now.

Totally Hilarious.....

2009-04-02T22:48:00.000-07:00

I was checking G2's homework and got a good laugh!

It was a must share!

The 'just born' look....

2009-03-29T02:35:00.000-07:00

I woke up and saw this giant head with wild, matted hair.

It brought back some bad memories,
it looked like he'd just passed through the birth canal...

thankfully not mine!

The Taller Half....

2009-03-28T19:18:00.000-07:00

GeTs A tAtOo!

He's a deep sleeper and I couldn't resist!

Next time I think I'll put one on his forehead!

huh?

2009-03-28T19:16:00.001-07:00

vegetarian pork?

25 CENT FUN...

2009-03-27T17:29:00.000-07:00

I'm not one for mass chaos and tons of noise,

so Chuck E Cheese's is not really my favorite place.

I do love the picture printing machine though...

how could I not? This sweet pic of G2 gave

me a much needed laugh! Enjoy!

The Taller Half...

2009-03-21T10:16:00.000-07:00

gEtS a PeDiCuRe!

DOH!

2009-03-09T14:17:00.001-07:00

I asked my brother-in-law to pick up a dead Christmas tree I'd seen on the side of the road so we could burn it in the cul-de-sac.

He did get the tree and totaled my car too!

In the end, it's all good. Well, other than the fact that I don't have a car right now. We got a decent settlement and I always hated the Tahoe anyhow. Six boys from the 'hood' went along for the wild ride and thought the crash was awesome!

Apparently there was no lesson learned here!

Good times!

________________________________________

We did torch the tree and it was awesome!

Here's a pic of one we burned on New Years Eve...

FEELIN THE LOVE....

2009-02-09T15:10:00.000-08:00

And it has lasted and lasted.... this is 'freals', it's an actual card that

my mom gave to my dad for Valentines Day. I don't know when

exactly, but from the vintage look of the card, it's been awhile!

I've had it for well over a decade, it was a must save!

My mom once told me (OK she told me a bazillion times)

if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.

So that said, I won't elaborate on their relationship

and the reasons I have tried to not emulate it!

Happy Valentines Day!

Hmmm....

2009-01-24T08:39:00.001-08:00

G1 is in Cub Scouts and this year for the annual Blue & Gold Banquet the theme is American ABC's so someone came up with the idea to have the boys request postcards from friends and family that live in other cities and states. The postcards will be used as decorations. We got this one from a friend of a family member. At first glance I thought... oh a cute furry animal... and then I took a closer look. Do you see what I see? Yeah, how could you not? When I showed G1 he got a confused look and said, you can see his weiner? When I showed G2 he just giggled.

Words of wisdom...

2009-01-15T14:20:00.000-08:00

...for the new year.

Have a fine 2009!

May you find your inner Pollyanna

as you discover the secret to happiness!

Who knew there was a secret to happiness? I found this among my gomers. If you aren't familiar with the term gomer, check out the archives: 10-14-08. Can you guess my favorite on this list? I think it would have to be: ~Take time to be alone. I'm all about being alone. I'm alone right now and I'm loving it. But really I should find out where the boys are since they just got home from school and all is calm. They must be outside in the sac (cul-de-sac), I'd better go check!

son of a....

2009-01-05T20:49:00.000-08:00

$%#@!

Well my good intentions of not swearing in 2009

were history before noon on January 1st.

Ahhh, who am I kidding?

I should've known that one was pointless!

Wishing you a....

2008-12-17T06:51:00.000-08:00

Due to lack of time and energy I decided to simplify things, go digital and just e-mail my Christmas card/letter this year. I wrote this poem to go along with it...

****

******

Almost a week before Christmas and all through our house
There’s nothing but chaos, I hope there’s no mouse!
Too many things on my list of to do’s…
I want to mail cards to each one of you’s
But cards I have none, no time to create.
I’d better hurry or else they’ll be late.
I guess I’ll go green, Al Gore will be happy!
They’ll be sent via e-mail… I know, it’s so sappy!
It will save me the cost of one hundred plus stamps
And help me avoid extra financial cramps.
I know it sounds cheap, but with this recession.
Even the price of one stamp is a little depressing.
So just think of the forests of trees you are saving
As you read and enjoy this paperless greeting!

Happy Holidays from our family to yours!

* * * * *

F.Y.I: In an effort to de-stress my life, I'll be enjoying a blog-free holiday

and won't be adding anything until after the first of the year.

PEACE OUT!

From bad to worse....

2008-12-09T19:37:00.000-08:00

So the external hard drive wigging was just the beginning.... ...now the actual computer has gone wiggety whack and I can't use it at all! Of course it gave out as I was in the process of backing up my files," just in case" - DOH! So now not only have I lost a year's worth of digital pictures, I can add a years worth of quicken data to that list too! Oiy! Apparently the stupid computer needs a major enema or something! If it weren't for the recession, I'd ask Santa for a new one. I'm using the Taller Half's lap top at the moment. But it's not always here and available, so I'm just going to let the blog go for now. I need to get my Christmas cards sent out and a billion other things done anyhow, so it's just as well!

2008-12-04T10:50:00.000-08:00

I have been feeling sad. I'm a tard and have not been backing up my files and our external hard drive wigged. It's looking like I may have lost about a years worth of digital pictures. So don't be dumb like me...

BACK UP YOUR STUFF!

Sunday Comics...

2008-11-17T05:31:00.000-08:00

I never read them anymore because I don't have too. My kids are funny enough on Sundays! Yesterday during church I had to take the little guy out for saying something very inappropriate. It was something I'd never heard him say before and now I'm wondering where he heard it. It was bad enough not to repeat. If you really need to know, you'll have to call me to find out! Anyway.... I took him out for a few minutes and made sure it wasn't a fun time for him or me. Not long after we were back in the meeting he said he wanted me to take him out. I told him no and he said, "well, I'm going to be naughty so you need to take me out". Nice try! When that didn't work he said more than once in a loud voice, "I need to take a dump".

Who knew?

2008-11-17T05:25:00.000-08:00

A couple of weeks ago I found this "scrap" piece of paper in the kitchen and was about to throw it away when I decided I'd better ask the boys what it was first. Good thing I did! G2 had made this very special parking pass for Grandpa so he could park in the garage while he was visiting. He's one creative little dude! My favorite thing about it is the total randomness of it's shape.

A sign of....

2008-11-14T08:12:00.000-08:00

...things to come?
I took this picture was taken on November 5, 2008, the day after the elections.

If you're feelin hungry....

2008-11-06T08:49:00.001-08:00

...you won't be after you see this!

Yep, this is freal! It was taken at least a couple of years ago, so I don't remember which G this plate belonged too. The poptart was left over from breakfast or brunch (extra nasty how it's touching the ketchup) and I had nuked the hot dog for lunch, but the tampon? Well, that was a total "what the?" moment for me. So naturally I had to take a picture. All the grease totally phobes me out and I doubt that even a super plus tampon could absorb it all!